Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
