if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
