I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
