guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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