If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
