Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
