"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
