I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize