hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
