At least make sure they are 18
Why
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
