Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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