My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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