There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
