i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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