Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
