We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
