windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
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