wake up i wanna do it froggy style
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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