Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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