I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
