She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
