Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
