Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
My day in three words: secret purse cake
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
