Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
50% drunk capacity currently
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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