Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
