Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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