ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
