We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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