I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
