So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
