how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
