names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
