I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
