it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I puked a lego.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
