Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
