Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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