its not stalking. its research.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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