If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
