i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Randomize