One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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