That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
He kissed a someone with a penis
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
