Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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