I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
NoShamevember. You game?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
