i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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