I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
