I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
