some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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