It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Randomize
