I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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