My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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